(Far) Away Days

Old Trafford

It couldn’t happen, could it? Could this finally be Liverpool’s year?

It is a thought that the red side of Manchester fears most.

Could City claim a unique domestic treble? And could Leeds United finally return to the top flight following a 15-year absence? It could be the perfect storm of domestic footballing rivalries.

So, come May, should the worst happen, where can Manchester United fans go to escape the never-ending posting of football-related news that, quite frankly, they will not want to hear?

Well, if shaking hands and congratulating them (even if through gritted teeth) is not an option, and for some, it clearly isn’t, here are Mark Bratt Travel’s Top 5 destinations to visit in May to avoid that dreaded title parade:

1: New Zealand

Nowhere on earth is further away from Liverpool than New Zealand. One great big adventure playground which famously has more sheep than people, there are plenty of wide open spaces across its stunning South Island where you will be the only non-ovine or whale in sight. Given neither species has any real concept of Football, it is unlikely that they will be celebrating Klopp’s title-winning side.

A quick swat-up on Rugby and Cricket will probably also mean you enjoy talking sport to the local humans, without having to bring up you know who….

2: Namibia

Rugged, remote and breath-taking. Namibia is home to some of the most incredible scenery – from the world’s largest sand dunes of the Namib desert, to the ship-wrecked lined Skeleton Coast and the wildlife-rich salt-pans of Etosha. In the magnificence of Africa’s wildlife you would be forgiven, even amongst the most die-hard of football fans, to forget your sporting worries back home.

To further add to Namibia’s appeal, a beer will set you back around 50p and its lack of infrastructure means, in parts, wifi is practically non-existent allowing you to sit back and take in the splendour of Southern Africa.

3: China

China does things differently, it always has. It is just one of the reasons why, culturally, a visit to China is so interesting and unique. With most western social media platforms banned you can forget all about the football by drinking Chinese tea in Beijing’s expansive Summer Palace;  trekking a part of the Great Wall; visiting the pandas in Chengdu, or walking amongst the Terracota Warriors in Xian.  Very few countries allow you to experience ancient wonders and cutting edge technology on the same trip. So whatever experience appeals to you, China will deliver.

4: Stay in a Yurt

A traditional homestead of central Asia, a Yurt (known as a Ger in Mongolia) is a portable tent-like home of the nomadic people of Central Asia. Used across the open grasslands of Asia from Kazakhstan through to Northern China.

5-star luxury they are not, but authentic and remote they definitely are. With no wifi and no connectivity of the wider outside world, you are left to enjoy the beauty of the empty landscape, the fascinating stories of the local and Mark’s least favourite drink in the world: Suutei Tsai (a hot, salted tea drink from Mongolia).

5: Maldives

A holiday destination that now needs little introduction. The Maldives offer stunning beaches, crystal clear water and incredible marine life. No matter how bad the outcome of the football, it is hard to remain troubled swinging in a hammock on a tropical atoll in the Indian Ocean

Still not remote enough?

Easter Island

The world’s most isolated airport is Mataveri International Airport on Rapa Nui. Made famous by its large Moai heads. An UNESCO world heritage site, the islands, administered by Chile are a 2,336 mile flight from the Chilean capital Santiago.

If that is not remote enough, then SpaceX may be your only hope…

So, where will you head for come May?


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